For all of those who did not know, yes, I had surgery and I resemble an 80 year old when I walk instead of the young 22 yr. old that I am (hehe). Seriously, I am happy to be home but do kinda miss my adjustable hospital bed but I guess that's the laziness in me talking! I have my "boys" here to wait on me and they are doing a great job so far but I think it will get old pretty quick here so I'll enjoy it while I can.
The reality is setting in that we will have our daughter very very soon. I have so many different visions of her, so many different ideas of what she will be like that it's driving me crazy.......what will her sweet voice sound like, how many chinese words/phrases will she know, will she be quiet (like her mama? Ha!) or loud and outspoken??? She is a bazillion million miles away from us right now but SOON, very SOON she will be a part of our family and be right here with us. Right here. How could we be any more blessed?
Saturday, March 31, 2007
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
TENTATIVE DATES
UPDATE: We received an email today from our SW, Sara, saying that we have "TENTATIVE" travel dates!!! We do not have our Travel Approval yet, however they are telling us to tentatively plan on traveling to Shandong Province, accompanied with our ISS guide Mary, on May 13/14th! We will get confirmation on the dates once our travel approval, aka Letter of Invitation to Travel, comes but we can pretty much count on traveling to China (Honk Kong) around 5/10 or so and meeting our daughter for the first time on 5/13 or 5/14/07. May I just add one more thing? May 13th is Mother's day, and while I will be sad not to be able to spend it with Brandon (BTW he tells me it's O.K.!) it is turning out to be a most appropriate day to get our baby girl. WE ARE THRILLED. Stay tuned............
Sunday, March 18, 2007
Ok, Ok Maria~Here you go!
Looks like I am getting some requests to post some more. I sure hope this isn't too boring!
For starters, our LOA was sent back to China on March 14th. Yay!!!!!! Now we wait for travel approval (TA). It appears that TA could come anywhere from 3 weeks to 6 weeks from March 14th. I personally think it will take about 4 weeks but one never does know......... When we get TA it is officially called our Letter of Invitation to travel. We will then receive the dates that we need to be in Hong Kong. All the travel arrangements are made by us. The agency will take care of booking the hotels. We will be staying in several hotels on our trip. Depending on where they have us flying in to (Hong Kong, Beijing) we will stay for approximately 2 nights in our arrival city, then travel by plane (China is freakishly huge) to Sydney's orphanage. We will stay in her hometown for close to 5 days or so and then we will have to make our way back down to Guangzhou (Guangdong Province), which is where the Consulate is. Everything will be finalized in Guangzhou. We will stay in Guangzhou for another several days and then make our way to Hong Kong for our departure. Lots of traveling but so many wonderful experiences I am sure!
We will definitely need our walking shoes as there are many tours planned and sites to see. This is all done by the ISS (International Social Services) staff in China. We have heard nothing but wonderful things about them and how they take such good care of you. We are gonna need it! Whooooo! Of course, if our sweet daughter is needing some extra TLC or we just don't feel like going anywhere we can also stay at our hotel, the choice is ours. I can probably safely say that although I am sure we will experiment when we can or TRY to be adventurous, our diet will mostly consist of KFC, McDonalds, and Pizza Hut. These are the three major fast food joints in China. Paul and I are pretty picky when it comes to food so we are hoping to lose a little weight on our trip. I know my belly is continually growing! I may be "paper pregnant" but they tell me it doesn't count and my belly should not grow. What do they know???
P.S. Kang Ling (Sydney) is in Shandong Province
Monday, March 12, 2007
It's a beautiful day! Letter of Acceptance came today!
Yes, it's true. Today was the day that we got the call from our social worker (the wonderful Sara) to let us know that our Letter of Acceptance (once again the lovely abbrev. LOA) came today. This is the letter that we sign our names to saying that yes, we DEFINITELY want to adopt Fu Kang Ling and make her a part of our family. It will be sent "overnight express" and then we will overnight it back to our agency and on to China it will go. Next step is receiving travel approval (TA). From the way it looks right now, we may not be traveling until early May because of the Trade Fair that takes place in China from 4/15-4/30/07 which we are hearing is a time in China that makes it almost impossible to get a hotel. We will keep you updated!
Today is a glorious day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Stay tuned.
P.S. Today was 84 days since LOI was sent (for all those fellow adopters who can truly appreciate this information)
Today is a glorious day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Stay tuned.
P.S. Today was 84 days since LOI was sent (for all those fellow adopters who can truly appreciate this information)
Saturday, March 10, 2007
Day 82 and counting............
Ok, thought it was time to give you all an update..............WE ARE GOING NUTS! It's getting a little more difficult every day that we have to wait to hear something but I will try my best to explain it. Today marks Day 82 since we have sent our Letter of Intent (LOI) to adopt Fu Kang Ling aka Sydney Rose. The average number of days it has been taking for other adoptive families who are adopting special needs (SN) children is right around 100 days from the time they send their LOI until they receive either a LOA (letter of acceptance) or TA (travel approval). Sorry for all the abbreviations but you would use them too! So you might say, well they are only 20 days or so away from getting their daughter.....? Well no. Not really. Here is just a short example of what we could be looking at until we get Sydney:
1) Receive LOA within the next 3 weeks
2) Sign LOA and send back to China
3) Receive TA about 3 weeks after that
4) Get travel dates, usually about 2-3 weeks later
5) Travel to China somewhere around 2nd week of May
(not our favorite option)
OR
1) Receive LOA within the next 5 days
2) Sign LOA and send back to China
3) Receive TA 2 weeks later
4) Get travel dates
5) Travel to China somewhere around mid-April
(one of our favorite options)
OR
1) Never receive LOA and just get TA within the next 5 days
2) Get travel dates 2 weeks later
3) Travel to China around March 30th
(a definite favorite option!)
The scary part is all of the above options are all distinct possibilities, every one of them. We just don't know. Sooooooo please hang tight with us as we try to get by these next couple of months. We know that God has a plan for us and it will be in His time. Prayers are accepted at this time, feel free to bombard Him with your prayers and if you feel the need to even beg a little, ga'head! LOL
We appreciate all the kind words, acceptance, and support from our family and friends.
Hold on Sydney, your family is coming for you.
Thursday, March 1, 2007
Monday, February 26, 2007
Teddy for Sydney
We sent this teddy bear from Build-a-Bear Workshop and mommy recorded a short message to Sydney so that she might recognize my voice when we meet her. We also included a small photo album, a disposable camera, and some candy and chocolates for the orphanage workers and the children.
Sunday, February 25, 2007
A Wonderfully well written post found on RQ post about what we can expect.
This is not a newborn. It’s a child who already has a personality, one that you get to try to figure out. It’s a child who has been ripped from all she knows: the people who have cared for her and kept her alive, and the language she has been able to understand even if she couldn’t speak it. The food she is used to. The other kids. Her schedule. Her crib. Her cribmate.
It’s all gone, and she’s with these people she’s never seen before and she can’t understand what is being said and the food is different. Scared and grieving does not even begin to describe things. Some babies just completely shut down and appear to be autistic, but after three or four days they start coming around and you begin to see the real child. It can take weeks (or months) for the grieving to stop, but after several days you should begin to see little pieces of their personality. Some children have different survival mechanisms and you’ll immediately see a little bubbly personality, this does not mean there is no grief, it could just mean that their survival instincts are telling them to be cute and lovable.
We all know this transition to a family is for the best in the long run, but all the child knows is how they feel right now, and they are scared and mad and grieving. Some move through it faster than others. Some seem to move through it in China and then backtrack once they are home. Some show their bubbly personality in China and then show the grief in America (or whatever country they are going to).
When you are in China they still hear Chinese in the restaurants and out on the street. And they still get some Chinese food. And the unique smells of China are still there.
But once you are home everything familiar to them is gone. By then you’ve probably switched them to American formula, they likely aren’t getting congee every morning now that it’s not on a buffet anymore, you probably can’t make steamed eggs exactly like they were in China. The smells are different, and no one is speaking Chinese anymore.
They might be able to keep their minds off of that during the day, when they are active and there is much to keep them occupied. But when their mind starts quieting down to go to sleep it all comes back, and there is still grief. So some babies just don’t go to sleep. Combine this with jet lag and it’s really not fun.
There will also be control issues that come up. Even with a 9 or 10 month old baby, they will try to gain control of something, anything, so they don’t feel so out of control. Maybe you can let them have it in some instances, but in others you’ll need to make sure you remain in control. Follow your instincts on this one - they need boundaries in order to feel safe, but letting them have some little piece of control may also help them. How do you know when it’s best to give in and when it’s best to be the parent? You just fly by the seat of your pants and hope you get it right.
My point here is that you have been waiting for this child for a really long time. But she knows nothing about you. She is scared and will act in ways you cannot currently imagine that a little 15 or 20 pound baby could possibly act.
I can remember getting so upset with my big girl when she was a toddler and into everything. I’d just pick her up and take her outside and put her in her swing and push her in it for a really long time. Before long we were both laughing and having fun. It worked for us.
It’s all gone, and she’s with these people she’s never seen before and she can’t understand what is being said and the food is different. Scared and grieving does not even begin to describe things. Some babies just completely shut down and appear to be autistic, but after three or four days they start coming around and you begin to see the real child. It can take weeks (or months) for the grieving to stop, but after several days you should begin to see little pieces of their personality. Some children have different survival mechanisms and you’ll immediately see a little bubbly personality, this does not mean there is no grief, it could just mean that their survival instincts are telling them to be cute and lovable.
We all know this transition to a family is for the best in the long run, but all the child knows is how they feel right now, and they are scared and mad and grieving. Some move through it faster than others. Some seem to move through it in China and then backtrack once they are home. Some show their bubbly personality in China and then show the grief in America (or whatever country they are going to).
When you are in China they still hear Chinese in the restaurants and out on the street. And they still get some Chinese food. And the unique smells of China are still there.
But once you are home everything familiar to them is gone. By then you’ve probably switched them to American formula, they likely aren’t getting congee every morning now that it’s not on a buffet anymore, you probably can’t make steamed eggs exactly like they were in China. The smells are different, and no one is speaking Chinese anymore.
They might be able to keep their minds off of that during the day, when they are active and there is much to keep them occupied. But when their mind starts quieting down to go to sleep it all comes back, and there is still grief. So some babies just don’t go to sleep. Combine this with jet lag and it’s really not fun.
There will also be control issues that come up. Even with a 9 or 10 month old baby, they will try to gain control of something, anything, so they don’t feel so out of control. Maybe you can let them have it in some instances, but in others you’ll need to make sure you remain in control. Follow your instincts on this one - they need boundaries in order to feel safe, but letting them have some little piece of control may also help them. How do you know when it’s best to give in and when it’s best to be the parent? You just fly by the seat of your pants and hope you get it right.
My point here is that you have been waiting for this child for a really long time. But she knows nothing about you. She is scared and will act in ways you cannot currently imagine that a little 15 or 20 pound baby could possibly act.
I can remember getting so upset with my big girl when she was a toddler and into everything. I’d just pick her up and take her outside and put her in her swing and push her in it for a really long time. Before long we were both laughing and having fun. It worked for us.
Saturday, February 24, 2007
OUR TIMELINE
December 5, 2005: Mailed in our application to Lifelink Adoption Agency, Appleton, WI.
December 12, 2005: Met with our Social Worker, Sara Meyer, for the first time to gather information about the adoption process. Made our decision to adopt from China.
December 29, 2005: 1st "official" interview with social worker.
January 16, 2006: Paul and Jill have their adoption physicals and lab work.
January 18, 2006: Individual interviews with social worker.
February 9, 2006: Home study visit with social worker and final home study interview.
March 3, 2006: Homestudy is finally completed!
March 24, 2006: Attended Adoption Seminar in Madison, WI. We learned a lot and met some wonderful friends! (Laura and Kevin, and Dawn and Lee).
April 18, 2006: Fingerprinted in Milwaukee, WI. We waited for this day for what seemed like forever.
May 18, 2006: Received our I-171H in the mail today, exactly one month after getting fingerprinted.
May 31, 2006: Received our final Wisconsin Seal today for our I-171H.
June 1, 2006: We sent all our paperwork via Fed-EX to Denise Hope in Illinois. She hand-delivered it to the Chinese Consulate. We're gettin' there!
June 8, 2006: Officially sent our completed dossier to Laura Stroup in the Rockford, Ill office.
June 26, 2006: Laura sent our dossier to China today.
July 5, 2006: LID! Our dossier was logged in today> Ahhhh, we can breathe a sigh of relief!
July 27, 2006: Sent letter to Sara (SW) to inform her of our interest in adopting a special needs child. Best decision we could have ever made.
November 20, 2006: Received a call from Sara saying that she had some information about a little girl born with a repaired mild heart condition, Patent Ductus Arterious, repaired cleft lip and unrepaired cleft palate. Would we be interesting in learning more.........? Ahhh, YES!!!!!
December 18, 2006: Letter of Intent to adopt FU Kang Ling sent to China. The countdown starts. As of today, the average time to get travel approval is taking about 100 days from the date the Letter of Intent was sent.
February 27, 2007: Today marks Day 70 since sending our Letter of Intent to adopt Fu Kang Ling. Still waiting for TA (Travel Approval). We hope and pray that it comes within the next 6 weeks. Once we receive our travel approval we will travel within 2-3 weeks.
March 12, 2007: We received our Letter of Seeking Confirmation of Adopter today!!!!
March 14, 2007: Our Letter of Seeking Confirmation of Adopter was sent back to China today.
March 21, 2007: Received an email today from our social worker Sara saying that ISS will not travel in China during 4/8-5/8/07 due to the trade fair in April and the Labor Day holiday in China during the 1st week of May. However, we received TENTATIVE DATES for our travel anyway!!!!! Mary, our guide, will travel with us to Shandong on May 13/14th!!! That's Mother's day! Even though these dates are not set in stone they will be pretty close and once we get our travel approval we can make our travel plans. One HUGE step forward to getting our "Ling-Ling". Come on travel approval...............!
April 4, 2007: We got our Travel Approval today! Our consulate appointment date is set for Monday, May 21st. Here we come Sydney!!!
December 12, 2005: Met with our Social Worker, Sara Meyer, for the first time to gather information about the adoption process. Made our decision to adopt from China.
December 29, 2005: 1st "official" interview with social worker.
January 16, 2006: Paul and Jill have their adoption physicals and lab work.
January 18, 2006: Individual interviews with social worker.
February 9, 2006: Home study visit with social worker and final home study interview.
March 3, 2006: Homestudy is finally completed!
March 24, 2006: Attended Adoption Seminar in Madison, WI. We learned a lot and met some wonderful friends! (Laura and Kevin, and Dawn and Lee).
April 18, 2006: Fingerprinted in Milwaukee, WI. We waited for this day for what seemed like forever.
May 18, 2006: Received our I-171H in the mail today, exactly one month after getting fingerprinted.
May 31, 2006: Received our final Wisconsin Seal today for our I-171H.
June 1, 2006: We sent all our paperwork via Fed-EX to Denise Hope in Illinois. She hand-delivered it to the Chinese Consulate. We're gettin' there!
June 8, 2006: Officially sent our completed dossier to Laura Stroup in the Rockford, Ill office.
June 26, 2006: Laura sent our dossier to China today.
July 5, 2006: LID! Our dossier was logged in today> Ahhhh, we can breathe a sigh of relief!
July 27, 2006: Sent letter to Sara (SW) to inform her of our interest in adopting a special needs child. Best decision we could have ever made.
November 20, 2006: Received a call from Sara saying that she had some information about a little girl born with a repaired mild heart condition, Patent Ductus Arterious, repaired cleft lip and unrepaired cleft palate. Would we be interesting in learning more.........? Ahhh, YES!!!!!
December 18, 2006: Letter of Intent to adopt FU Kang Ling sent to China. The countdown starts. As of today, the average time to get travel approval is taking about 100 days from the date the Letter of Intent was sent.
February 27, 2007: Today marks Day 70 since sending our Letter of Intent to adopt Fu Kang Ling. Still waiting for TA (Travel Approval). We hope and pray that it comes within the next 6 weeks. Once we receive our travel approval we will travel within 2-3 weeks.
March 12, 2007: We received our Letter of Seeking Confirmation of Adopter today!!!!
March 14, 2007: Our Letter of Seeking Confirmation of Adopter was sent back to China today.
March 21, 2007: Received an email today from our social worker Sara saying that ISS will not travel in China during 4/8-5/8/07 due to the trade fair in April and the Labor Day holiday in China during the 1st week of May. However, we received TENTATIVE DATES for our travel anyway!!!!! Mary, our guide, will travel with us to Shandong on May 13/14th!!! That's Mother's day! Even though these dates are not set in stone they will be pretty close and once we get our travel approval we can make our travel plans. One HUGE step forward to getting our "Ling-Ling". Come on travel approval...............!
April 4, 2007: We got our Travel Approval today! Our consulate appointment date is set for Monday, May 21st. Here we come Sydney!!!
Poem to a birth mother (Author Unknown)
Beyond your Tears
I imagine you kissed her sweet face so round
And gently placed her where she would be found
I imagine your heartache your pain and your tears
I wish I could show you and soften your fears
I’d show you a girl with hope in her eyes
A girl who loves stories and sweet lullabies
A girl who laughs freely and loves to play
A girl who sings sweetly and dances all day
A girl with a future , so funny and smart
A girl who loves music and reading and art
A girl who I hope has your courage one day
I know it took courage to love and walk away
Her beautiful smile I wish you could see
She looks like you and laughs like me
So, imagine her laughter, imagine her touch
I wish I could show you she’s loved so much
Remember her face, remember that kiss
And when you cry, remember this
Beyond your tears, beyond your pain
Sometimes the sun shines through the rain
And I know that she’ll ask me about you one day
I’ll tell her you loved her and wished she could stay
I’ll help her remember and imagine you too
When she starts to wonder and dream about you
We’ll look at the moon, I’ll give her a kiss
And when she cries I’ll tell her this
Beyond your tears
Beyond your pain
Sometimes the sun
Shines through the rain
I imagine you kissed her sweet face so round
And gently placed her where she would be found
I imagine your heartache your pain and your tears
I wish I could show you and soften your fears
I’d show you a girl with hope in her eyes
A girl who loves stories and sweet lullabies
A girl who laughs freely and loves to play
A girl who sings sweetly and dances all day
A girl with a future , so funny and smart
A girl who loves music and reading and art
A girl who I hope has your courage one day
I know it took courage to love and walk away
Her beautiful smile I wish you could see
She looks like you and laughs like me
So, imagine her laughter, imagine her touch
I wish I could show you she’s loved so much
Remember her face, remember that kiss
And when you cry, remember this
Beyond your tears, beyond your pain
Sometimes the sun shines through the rain
And I know that she’ll ask me about you one day
I’ll tell her you loved her and wished she could stay
I’ll help her remember and imagine you too
When she starts to wonder and dream about you
We’ll look at the moon, I’ll give her a kiss
And when she cries I’ll tell her this
Beyond your tears
Beyond your pain
Sometimes the sun
Shines through the rain
Friday, February 23, 2007
Welcome to the story of our family and to our chosen path to Sydney.
We are very excited to be posting from our brand new Blog~Dedicated to our journey to Fu Kang Ling, soon to be known as Sydney Rose. She was born on December 3, 2004 and was found abandoned at the steps of the Jinan Social Welfare Institute, located in Jinan city in Shandong Province, on May 3, 2005. They approximated her to be 5 months old, therefore they gave her a birthdate of December 3, 2004. Of course we will never know for sure when her birthday really is but we will celebrate December 3rd from here on out, and we will also celebrate the day she was adopted.
This is about a family of 3 becoming a family of 4 (or really 5, sorry Bella!). As important as it is to tell our family and friends about our long-awaited journey to get our daughter, it is even more exciting to share with you the experiences of Brandon getting a baby sister. OK, OK, so maybe he would have preferred a brother, however we believe he will be crazy in love with his little sister and she is going to be one lucky little girl to get such an amazing big brother.
We cannot wait to share with you all our fun, crazy, exhausting, and unbelievably lucky days to come with our newest addition, Sydney Rose Geroux.
This is about a family of 3 becoming a family of 4 (or really 5, sorry Bella!). As important as it is to tell our family and friends about our long-awaited journey to get our daughter, it is even more exciting to share with you the experiences of Brandon getting a baby sister. OK, OK, so maybe he would have preferred a brother, however we believe he will be crazy in love with his little sister and she is going to be one lucky little girl to get such an amazing big brother.
We cannot wait to share with you all our fun, crazy, exhausting, and unbelievably lucky days to come with our newest addition, Sydney Rose Geroux.
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